GIVING THANKS

Neil’s spirit was very much with us at this, our first Thanksgiving without him. Marla Joel and I brainstormed on how best to honor Neil’s  memory on this day. Most of the ideas revolved around charity/Hospcie/Giggle Fund.   . It  suddenly became clear to me how to best honor Neil.  Yiddish was the language of Neil's heart.. A language I have long  shunned as “old fashioned”. The language our parents spoke when they did not want us to understand them. Our four grandchildren will have their first Yiddish lesson. This is how we will honor Neil today.

I perused our bookshelves studying  Neil’s extensive library, noting how much the books we collect tell  about who we are and what we value.  I choose a book called Essential Yiddish and proceeded to  select   the words that our grandchildren would learn this day, 10 words to start. I left the task of how to teach these words to Joel and Marla, both very creative teachers.  Marla suggested  each child make a book,  with one word on each page to be illustrated by them. I liked that idea, and we will do that.

Joel embellished on the plan, by gathering the kids around us ,  asking one of them to bring him a glass of vassar (water) while telling them that we are all mispochcha (family).  He wove a tale using the Yiddish words  on the list.   The kids were encouraged to guess the meaning.  This was followed by review games, the final review game was for the kids to create and perform a skit using each of the words.  They met the challenge  and entertained us with their “creativity.”  I will continue to send new lists of words and Yiddish expressions via email. It will be Joel and Marla’s task  to teach them to their children.  L” dor v dor.
Hopefully in our own small way the Rudin/Gluck family will keep a bit of Yiddishkeit alive.  Neil would be
so pleased.

As I sat at the Thanksgiving table in Marla and Mike’s lovely  home, I took in the faces gathered at the table. Lynn,  Mike’s mother, my much loved friend, sat to my right and Michael on my left and all around me other beautiful shinning faces. Jordan, almost six, asked each of us to participate in her school projeclt. We were to write our answer to  this  sentence:   I am thankful for………..
We willingly complied. After completing the task we each read the responses that ranged from:
I am thankful for my good looks to I am thankful for my family. But it was Jordan’s response that won my heart.  “I AM THIANKFUL FOR THE WORLD AND EVERYTHING THAT’S IN IT.” It does not get more inclusive than that.  Me too, Jordan, me too.

Thank you Neil for the gift of the family we have created together. We each mourn you in our own  idiosyncratic  way and at our own pace, but as Zack so well stated, we each have a piece of your heart in ours. And there it will stay.  You live in us and in the faces of our grandchildren. You are so alive in us, my sweet boy.
Cheryl
Novemeber, 2011